Words for You

 

A marine biologist developed a race of genetically engineered dolphins that could live forever if they were fed a steady diet of seagulls.  One day his supply of the birds ran out so he had to go out and trap some more.  On the way back, he spied two lions asleep on the road.  Afraid to wake them, he gingerly stepped over them.  Immediately, he was arrested and charged with transporting gulls across sedate lions for immortal porpoises. 

 

An Indian chief was feeling very sick, so he summoned the medicine man.  After a brief examination, the medicine man took out a long, this strip of elk rawhide and gave it to the chief, telling himn to bite off, chew, and swallow one inch of the leather every day.  After a month, the medicine man returned to see how the chief was feeling.

 

The chief shrugged and said, "The thong is ended, but the malady lingers on."

 

 

Evidence has been found that William Tell and his family were avid bowlers.  However, all the Swiss league records were unfortunately destroyed in a fire, and we'll never know for whom the Tells Bowled.